Radiohead Fan Diary

Last update: 2007-01-13 16:54:51

Historical notice: I made this in summer 2001. It is available in its original (and untidied) form here

Mike-Net was having a walk yesterday and came across the following diary by a typical Radiohead fan, clearly abandoned and lost, in someone's house. It clearly is real, and so cannot be accused as a rip-off of anything else. So there.

June 4th

Went out and bought Amnesiac. It's fantastic! I really feel Thom's isolation in this one. It's definitely the best one yet. I've been listening to it non-stop. I got the special book edition, and the normal CD so I won't damage the book, and another CD in case I lost the first CD by taking it around with me, and the tape because Radiohead are so good at doing cassette sleeves, a quality so often overlooked. Stanley Donwood is a genius!

I have to say that so far my favourite tracks are all of them, except for Knives Out which is a bit too commercial, and I heard Thom didn't like it for a long time. Maybe I will like it soon. It must be really good, because it is by Radiohead! Morning Bill got his copy a week ago from an indie record shop. He also downloaded all the songs off Napster anyway but I really wanted to wait because that's much more exciting. He bought it for the artwork anyway.

June 5th

Listened to Amnesiac before going to school, and I brought in the CD to show all my friends. They all think its ace, except for John, he thinks Thom is stupid. I tried to play it in the common room but I got told it was rubbish by lots of people who called them pretentious and arrogant. I nearly cried. How could some call Colin pretentious? He's a bassist! Anyway, Julie told me they weren't any good since The Bends and that Smashing Pumpkins are much better. Well Billy Corgan does look a bit like Phil, but apart from that Radiohead are much better.

I am hoping to get that rare Charles Mingus bootleg off Morning Bill on the internet this week. He really was an ace musical visionary, like Jonny and Thom! Except not as wonderful. Listened to OK Computer as soon as I got home. It's so great!

June 6th

I received my new Radiohead badge in the post this morning. It's round and says 'I love Radiohead' on it. Morning Bill said he'd sent the Mingus bootlegs to my via e-mail. I got a new e-mail address, ThomThom@Thom.com.

Listened to Amnesiac again. Nearly cried with joy. Julie said at school today that Thom Yorke had a freaky eye. I pointed out that Billy Corgan had a freaky voice. Got into an argument with Jim about Tony Blair. I said that he was useless and evil, like Thom said. Jim said he was just evil. I nearly freaked. Kicking Screamin' Gucci Little Piggy! Wow, that bit in Paranoid Android makes me scream in anger!

June 15th

Lost my diary then. This week I managed to get tickets for the Radiohead gig in Oxford next month. I'm so excited! Listened to the Bends twice this morning, then Kid A. The musical visionary is brilliant!

On the Radiohead chat room I had a chat with Morning Bill and Debaser Paul. Debaser said that Morning Bell was a rubbish song, but I pointed out that it moved me to tears whenever I visualised Thom cutting the kids in half (metaphorically!) but he said that the drums were repetitive but I said all songs were by their very nature repetitive which is what makes me love them. And Thom said it was good and so it must be by definition really good. Bill said that he liked Morning Bell which is why he named himself after it. He used to be called Paranoid BillDroid. Morning Bill is my best friend. If he didn't live in Canada we'd do everything together.

Heard a Radiohead song today on the telly! It was Electioneering, on Eastenders. I hate Eastenders because Jonny made some comment about it. Watched Meeting People Is Easy again. That bit where Thom looks sad on the escalator makes my cry, so does the bit where Colin says they aren't happy. Its so hard being Radiohead!

June 17th

Got that Mingus bootleg downloaded fully. It's really good. I don't like it much, because it's jazz, but since Jonny and Thom love it I do too. Watched my compilation of Radiohead videos. I've got all of them, even Pop Is Dead, which, despite being rubbish, is really good. It makes me cry when I hear the lyrics... 'Pop is dead...long live pop.' even in 1992 Thom was trying to break through the lyrical form. Listened to my Japanese import Pablo Honey again, and played Street Spirit on my guitar. Just realised Idioteque is really intense! Ice age coming!

Morning Bill e-mailed me again. When I'm feeling low he really cheers me up. He's got a limited edition 13-inch picture disc of 'Stop Whispering' from Germany. I'm so jealous! He says that there's only 250 copies in existence as most were binned because they were and inch too big to fit on most record players. I'm still so jealous! It has a picture of a cow on it, like Pink Floyd. I spent ages trying to get a copy of the Drill EP about a year ago, and Morning Bill, or Paranoid Billdroid as he was then, helped me. He's so cool!

I'd better stop writing now, my mum says I have to tidy my room. I got two new e-mail addresses today as well - PyramidSinger@thom.com and HuntedBear@Thom.com

June 19th

My big Jonny Greenwood poster fell down off the ceiling on top of me when I was sleeping but its OK because its Phil's turn to be up there this time. I lost one of my copies of Amnesiac at school today in the common room. Jim says Julie stole it but I know he's lying because she already has it and she thinks its rubbish.

Got into a massive argument with a Linkin Park fan. She thinks that Stinkin Park are much more intense than Radiohead and that Thom is too ugly to be alive! I bet she stole my copy of Amnesiac, the idiot. She told me that if she saw Thom is the street she'd stare and laugh and I told her she was really insensitive and so I told her that if I saw Linkin Park I'd shoot them. Then she said that if ever there was proof of the badness of Radiohead its that they're big whingers. So during Science I stole her Limp Bizkit ruler and wrote "Thom Yorke forever!" on it and I've spent all evening text messaging her on my phone about how bad Stinkin Park are. She's really shallow and carries her phone around with her everywhere so she'll be annoyed for ages! I used to carry my phone about too, but then I heard "mobiles chirping" and realised they were a scourge on society, like cars, and major record labels.

Got a new e-mail address YorkeGreenwoodGreenwoodSelwayOBrian@Thom.com and ThomColinJonnyPhilEd@thom.com. I'll have to tell everyone to use these addresses, so they can memorise Radiohead's names fully. It'll be helpful because every so often I just start going on about Jonny and Ed and my dad doesn't have any idea what I'm on about. Though I think he knows really.

June 20th

My english essay was due in for today. The teacher was really angry but I told her that I kept scrapping what I'd done and stuff. But I'd also been listening to Kid A and Amnesiac all the time too. I told her if she gave me ages I'd be able to write two interesting and experimental essays. She said that she wouldn't want to read those, because they'd be rubbish and hard to read. I don't know what she meant.

June 23rd

I bought the Autechre album today. I don't like it at all, but its really good. You can tell why Thom loves it. It really shows alienation. I'm glad I'm a Radiohead fan so I can learn about all these ace bands, and stuff. I'm so glad I'm not a Manics fan any more!

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