My Adventures in Time and Space
The Adventures of Pacman
Smileyman
The untitled pub-based comic
Terminator Salvation Script
Melody ShakerIt's Christmas time - there's no need to be afraid, as Band Aid memorably sung. But is not Christmas time and so it is time to be afraid - afraid of this new magazine Melody Shaker! Forged from the ashes of corpse of Rolling Spoon and something else, this magazine features strongly opininated rants about indie bands and their haircuts.
Moby has expressed his disappointment at Bush's re-election by re-releasing his hit advert, sorry, album Play, buying every copy and posting it to George W Bush's house in Washington DC, without a stamp on it. It's possible that I read that wrong.
Johnny Greenwood from Radiohead has announced his latest project - music for shoes. "Shoes are a commonly neglected clothing," Greenwood announced. This follows on from his 2001 project, Hat Music, which highlighted the plight of neglected headware.
Coldplay star Chris Martin has announced his plans to collaborate with R'n'B star Kanye West on his forthcoming album. Nobody cares.
Franz Ferdinand have announced details of their new album. Singer Alex Kapranos said on the phone yesterday to a friend: "It's coming along really well. It will be similar in style to the last one, only it will be moving in a new direction. We haven't named it yet, but it will probably be something arty and German, like Auf Deutsch or Ich Bin. Yes, I do like your new trousers." He then noticed us.
The Burning Place Camden's Exotic Fig Ballroom, Glasgow, June 22nd
"Before the gig," The Place's charismatic frontman Jack McGoohan confides, "there's a kind of scared silence. A calm before the storm, if you will." He takes a swig of Dr Pepper. This is The Burning Place's first gig for 2 years, and it is no disappointment. McGoohan takes to the stage and immediatly launches into a rendition of new single Placemat before mumbling something incoherant to guitarist and schoolfriend Georgios Santandez. It is a measure of how far they have come in just 2 years by the way that they are no longer afraid of a diminshed 7. By the time they launch into early hit I'm Here & I'm Now the few detractors are silenced. Tonight, the Burning Place rule. McGoohan and his cronies disappear into the night; the last, great gang in town. 5/10 - Poor quality haircuts
Dexter Fletcher 3000 Ol' Dirty's Love Shack, Penzance, Friday October 91st
"The greatest gig ever?" declares Dexter Fletcher 3000's vocalist and zitherist Dalben Kofast, before metaphorically and literally exploding into a hyperbole of youth culture, culture-bending new single Welsh/Italian. For twenty seven minutes, the crowd is putty in his hands, bending to his every whim, as he and his bandmates Gellmist Ksyc (guitars), Calth Estocom (bass) and Roger Davis (drums) weave 4 minute epics of love, loss, death, destruction and creation. It's hard to know what motivates Kofast, but it has to be exotic stealth beats, as he leaps from Dutch hardcore to Kando-wampa rap, all within 2 minutes of Don't Don't. This is it, kids. Don't die now. 9/10 - New heirs to the throne of ninja rock
SINGLE OF THE WEEK The Frenzied Over Backwards
The other day I went to the shops, and bought a CD. It was the Strokes. I used to think that they were brilliant, but then it was decided that they weren't. Luckily for me, the White Stripes are still cool so I still like them. I haven't seen a picture of the Frenzied yet, but judging by this song, they're a bunch of scruffy welsh art students - and what could be better than that? Unless they turn out to actually be scruffy welsh art students, in which case I hate it. 10/10
Smileyman - Music - The adventures of Smileyman - The Cheeriest Man in Britain!
Olly Enthuse - Music - The adventures of Olly Enthuse - but he always goes too far!
The untitled pub-based comic - Music - A comic strip that I periodically make which is set in a pub. Now with Episode 13! Yes!